I have spent six weeks at my job and this past week has been full time. Alas, I am a temp and therefore my assignment is only until the 24th July. Sometimes I have a lovely time with the kids; picking buttercups and looking at bee hotels, making paper aeoplanes to understand symmetry or painting batik flags with wax Star of David' in the middle. Sometimes it is mundane; tying shoes, having orange peel thrust in your pockets, separating mutinous kids with evil plots afoot as they line up in the dinner queue. Sometimes it's a tad painful; a misplaced moment when a child swings a tennis racquet awkwardly and smacks you in the face by mistake. Sometimes it is downright depressing, especially when you have to read the notes on some of these kids. It is then that you feel less of an education provider and more of a behavioural psychologist and/or social worker.
There are also days where you just feel done with life at school. Yesterday was stifling, both humid and overcast and it reflected in regards to general morale. I cannot discuss the school set up or the situation, however I have noticed that there seems to be an awful amount of temp staff there. We are treated well enough, but It is not the easiest of times and there is a sense that the temps are the 'emotional prostitutes' of the education system. It is a problem that is duplicated around the country. There are communication breakdowns abound. We are not 'wanted'. but we are 'needed'. I try not to be too despondant and take things personally in this job, but it can be difficult not to.
I have awoken with 'Uninvited' in my head most mornings. The sentiment of Morissette's lyrics are different to the set up just described. I don't even have them warming up to me on anything but a superficial level, unlike Morissette's suitor.in her song. Mostly, I shrug it off, but I sometimes feel very alone.
But you, you're not allowed
An unfortunate slight