The Little Birds Fly

Down to the Calico Sea

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50 Day Question Challenge 2017 - Day 12
calico_pye
Image result for talk show

12. If you could be interviewed on any talk show, which one would it be?

None.  The whole idea makes me shudder.

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Oh, you don't know how to have fun!
Jerry Springer.
First, study the John Cleese-Rowan Atkinson Beekeeper interview, then choose words which you believe must come up, along with the noises to make. Practice these. Keep them ready and listen for your cues.
Then practice your Anna Faris House Bunny Introduction voice, which is MUCH more alarming than the Linda Blair Exorcist voice. Once you have it down, practice until you can say "My asshole prays to Satan!" without giggling.
You can also practice turning a giggle into mediumistic possession. Ad lib this.
Oh, I almost forgot: when you are introduced, wait until the end of the description and shout "AS FORETOLD IN THE PROPHECY!"

This is all I've got without hearing the interview topic.

No it isn't. At the end of the allotted time, cut off the interviewer before the wrap and say, "How soon can you let me know if I've got the job?"

Is furniture-slinging mandatory or optional on these shows?

Not sure. There may be cash incentives.

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